It's conking out on start up!!!

..if it ain't one thing it's another (it seems).
I've recently had the fuel pump/filter replaced and though the battery was low, had it out on the road after three months standing in the drive and gave it a good old blast up and down the A3.
Just removed the battery and charged it, started fine then after about 10 secs it conked, started it again, 5 secs then conk - now the f**er won't start at all!!
WTF is going on? Is it some sort of immobiliser/ECU 're-learning' thing?
It was running fine yesterday and the day before.
There is half a tank of petrol in there and priming sound from the pump is present.

(tried to delete this irrelevant post but that function doesn't seem to be an option)

Ok, the battery was charged enough to start it up, but very low (the headlights were as dim as candles) - surely once it's started it should continue to run? (or not?)

Sounds like your battery is on its way out, or at least needs a ruddy good charge.

Thanks Rob - I was hoping it was just that.

Ok, just bought and installed new battery and the problem remains!
Getting seriously f***ing frustrated and starting to throw and break things!
There *is* sound from the fuel pump and there *is* pressure to the rail at the front (disconnected plug and petrol pissed out).
Have checked plugs/leads - all ok. Checked fuses, also ok, plenty of fuel in tank.
What should the cut off switch (passenger foot-well) look like during normal running?

When you say it doesn't start, does it -

turn over and not fire
not turn over

How old is the fuel?

Do you get any sound of it firing at all or is it just spinning freely?

Lights still dim with the new battery?

It's ok - looks like the sender unit on the pump is either faulty or stuck halfway.
I tried everything (spark plugs, fuel pump priming noise, HT leads, earth leads, fuses, cut off switch) conclusion was that although the fuel gauge is registering half full it is - in fact ...empty!
Filled it up and ...brrrrrum!
I guess I'll just have to keep a note of the mileage every time I fill up.

Is that one of my pumps? I'll get another out if that's the suspect.

Remind me what age the car is?

Thanks Ian - it's a 2000 (W plate) I was wondering if it was one of those conflict issues between sender and digital/analogue dash.

That would explain the fuel sender issue as the digital type have a sliding seat for the float.